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Most usesless crimbo present?

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Started by dano in Chit-Chat

Mine has to be the complete portable shoe shine kit..for the discerning boot wearer on the move! Not bad, although it’s not buffing my trainers up very well!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:27

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#1

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

There was an article in a magazine recently (probably Chat or somesuch) about Britain’s stingiest woman and one of her things was to keep all of her crap Christmas presents so she could dole them out to some other unsuspecting fool the following year.

I fortunately didn’t receive anything entirely useless this year, I did get a large box of Mingles which were quite offensive (there is something very, very WRONG with putting mint and chocolate together in any form) but they were good for handing round to guests and looking generous with :D

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:34

#2

dano wrote:

WHAT?! Are you mad?! How could you possibly forget the quality that was Terry’s Pyramint?!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:35

#3

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

Whilst I will bow my head in wonder at such an awesome power-pun, I cannot possibly contemplate the horror of eating one of the bloody things - ew!

Mint is refreshing and sharp, chocolate is creamy and smooth - they cannot be mixed! It doesn’t enhance either, it just makes them both taste bad :mad:

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:40

#4

dano wrote:

Did you ever try a pyramint?! They were bloody tops!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:42

#5

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

I wouldn’t eat one even if you Tony Blair Dared me to. It’s bad and it’s wrong.

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:44

#6

dano wrote:

Tony Blair dare..hell no! How about a Lionel Blair dare? I’ll name it in 3!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:47

#7

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

It’s a well known fact that you can’t get higher than a Tony Blair Dare. Da-da-dooo

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:56

#8

dano wrote:

I’m not having this, get yer tap dancin’ shoes on..it’s war!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 01:58

#9

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

Heh, are we going all West Side Story? I wanna be the Sharks.

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:00

#10

dano wrote:

Are you a sheep or a shark? You have a neck..you’re a sheep, sharks don’t have necks, they sleaze their way to the top..80’s style.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am that guy, I’ll be the shepard of this flock of sharks.

Doo-doo-doo-duh-doo
Doo-doo-doo-duh-doo

SAFETY DANCE!

(My only regret, is that I have boneitis)

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:08

#11

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

What if I have an obscenely large collar so you can’t see my neck? Are we talking Men Without Hats?

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:11

#12

dano wrote:

Never mind disguising the fact..sheep or shark, make up your mind!

80’s style!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:16

#13

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

I’ll go sheep, I chew the cud.

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:17

#14

dano wrote:

No safety dance for you!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:20

#15

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

I can dance if I want to. I can leave my friends behind… :p

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:24

#16

dano wrote:

Without safety approval..it ain’t a safety dance..80’s style!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:33

#17

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

I’m pretty sure if there was one person I would never appoint as a safety inspector, it would be you…Homer :p

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:34

#18

dano wrote:

Homer? That’s not as in homer sexual!

Doh!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 02:38

#19

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

Well, you do listen to Men Without Hats. What can I say?

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 03:04

#20

dano wrote:

Men at work?

I come from the land down under!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 03:09

#21

hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:

That’s quite an impressive range.

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 03:25

#22

Lola* wrote:

dano wrote:

No safety dance for you!

have you heard the remix on the bio dome soundtrack?

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 22:16

#23

dano wrote:

You could say…when you dance..make sure it’s safe!

Posted on Sun, 11 January 2004 at 22:40

#24

motherh666 wrote:

Title: Useless present

I got a base-ball cap with a police-siren on it.
I didn’t even take it out of it’s box.

I’m 23 years old for christ sake. Give me a bottle of something.

Posted on Mon, 12 January 2004 at 09:20

#25

JSar666 wrote:

LOL! :)

I didn’t get a lot of presents, but the one thing I got that was useless was a belt that was way to long. My dad couldn’t even get it on.

Posted on Mon, 12 January 2004 at 10:29

#26

JSar666 wrote:

Sorry, too long.

Posted on Mon, 12 January 2004 at 10:58

#27

motherh666 wrote:

you can still press the ‘edit’ button if you find a spelling mistake.

Posted on Mon, 12 January 2004 at 14:58

#28

JSar666 wrote:

Not after 5 minutes. Apparently you have to get in touch with hooch after 5 mins.

Actually, the shittiest present I got (metaphorically) was a broken heart. My gf decided to dump me over Christmas :( I was really out of it a couple of days ago, but I’m fine now. I just don’t think I’ll ever meet anyone that can make me feel like that again :( Oh well, there’s always my guitar and WoM to make me feel better :)

Posted on Mon, 12 January 2004 at 21:42

#29

Blonde Blade wrote:

How can anyone not like Mingles?

Posted on Tue, 13 January 2004 at 15:30

#30

Alan wrote:

JSar666 wrote:

I didn’t get a lot of presents, but the one thing I got that was useless was a belt that was way to long. My dad couldn’t even get it on.

Yeah, I got a belt as a present a couple of months ago, and the thing is just so huge it would fall off Vanessa Phelps!

Posted on Tue, 13 January 2004 at 16:16

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