#31
soul doubt (an) wrote:
:D this one will definatly work here… must keep that one in mind…
Posted on Fri, 15 July 2005 at 10:43
#32
Divers (Simon) wrote:
I don’t know if this a Doh or Duh moment but some girl I used to go out with when I was doing my GCSEs made a huge blunder in the English Lit exam. The Shakespear play we had to learn was Ceaser, which i found hard enough and i had try to learn the scenes. Anyway when we came out of the exam i asked her how she got on and she said it was really really hard. So i said i thought so too, and asked which bits gave her problems? so she told me that the ceaser play wasn’t to bad but macbeth and the other two plays she didn’t know so she didn’t think she did that well on those questions. So I worked out she did everything in the exam and not just the play that we had meant to study. Doh, but i did try and cheer her up by saying that everyone else took three hours to do one play and she did four in that time. But i don’t think she took it that way.
Oh well;rolleyes:
Posted on Fri, 15 July 2005 at 10:58
#33
soul doubt (an) wrote:
I’ve just had a DOH moment…
I was planning to bid on ebay on the french 5-track promo of semi-detached. It still had 10 minutes to go… I decided to wait antoher 5 minutes… started surfing around… I looked at ebay again and the 10 minutes where over already … :(
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 16:37
#34
ctrlaltdelete (chris) wrote:
someone asked me the other day how I would see myself dying.And I said it would be a DOH! moment.You know like, you do something and then a split second before dying Id think-“aw fuck what have I done?” then bam dead… Dunno, maybe something like getting a piece of toast out of the toaster with a knife.Then when Im dead, everyone will say, aw man what an idiot…
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 18:03
#35
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
ctrlaltdelete wrote:
Dunno, maybe something like getting a piece of toast out of the toaster with a knife.
That’s bound to happen to me, I do it all the time. But it’s ok, my toaster and I have an understanding: If it doesn’t electrocute me, then I’ll keep feeding it bread. ;)
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 20:20
#36
Divers (Simon) wrote:
“I’m Talkie toaster, does anybody fancy some Toast?”
“no”
“how about a crumpet?”
“NO, No toast, no tea cakes, no bun, baps or bagals, no muffins, No pancakes, and defently no smegging flapjacks!”
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 22:45
#37
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
“Ah, so you’re a waffle man!” ;)
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 22:51
#38
Divers (Simon) wrote:
:D
Can’t beat the classics:)
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 22:53
#39
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 22:54
#40
Divers (Simon) wrote:
“Do you have any questions that aren’t bread related?”
“would you like a fruit bun?”
“i said nothing bread related”
“I know but they are slightly currenty too!”
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 22:59
#41
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
Heheh. I like the bit just before that. Something like:
‘Anything? I can ask you anything at all, and you will answer?’
‘yes’
‘Metaphysics, the meaning of life, the nature of the universe, truly anything and you will answer?’
‘yes, anything at all. Ask me.’
‘ok, here is my question: would you like a bagel?’
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:02
#42
Divers (Simon) wrote:
After talking to you other other day about the dvd’s I have been going through re-watching them again, it’s been great.
The original holly cracks me up!
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:05
#43
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
Damn you. :mad: He is the best, though, yeah.
From the last series:
‘If I’m so stupid, explain this:’
…
…
…
‘Explain what, Hol?’
‘See, you can’t can you?’
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:09
#44
Divers (Simon) wrote:
In the Queeg episode
“what do you mean I have a IQ of 6 thats a poor IQ for a glass of water!”
or
“My IQ is 6000, it’s not that much it’s only 12,000 car park attendents”
“I will play you in any game you wish, the loser will be erased”
“chess”
“any game you like, ludo”
“chess”
“happy familys you can have mr bun the baker?”
“chess”
“anything, poker, guess who”
“chess”
“Cludo, you can have colnel Mustard”
“Chess”
“oh so your a chess man!”
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:17
#45
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
:D And I just love the image of him ‘walking’ the corridors as the nightwatchman, too. :D
I wonder if the film will ever actually get made? Probably not. :( A pity.
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:21
#46
Divers (Simon) wrote:
I doubt it will. Anyway thats enough excitement for me for one night I’m off to bed. Night Night:)
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:22
#47
marksims wrote:
Red Dwarf…well if you cant beat em join em…
“Listen, can anyone hear anything?”
“No”
“Precisely, no-one can hear anything. And do you know why we cant hear anything?”
“Why?”
“Because there are no sounds to hear…”.
White Hole, Series 4 episode 3. Ithankewe…
Oh yeh, my DOH!! moment, I was round a friends place jamming on his strat and was playing a few riffs, I just happen to throw the horns in true Andy Cairns fashion when his girlfriend walked in the room and my left hand hit her right tit full on!!!!
DOH!!!!
But also…mmmmmmmm, boobies…
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:24
#48
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
‘Why don’t we just blast them with our laser cannons?’
‘an excellent suggestion sir, with just two drawbacks. One, we don’t have any laser cannons, and two, we don’t have any laser cannons. Now I realise that technically this is just the one problem, but I thought it was such a big one, that it was worth mentioning twice.’
I could go on all night. Which is a good reason to stop there! :D
‘An excellent suggestion sir, but from now on might I suggest this conversation be carried out by people with brains larger than a grape?’
(And that’s not a ‘D’Oh’ moment, surely? :))
Night night.
Posted on Fri, 22 July 2005 at 23:30
#49
marksims wrote:
In other words…
001100011110101001110011100110001110001.
Which roughly translated means…”Dont stand around talking crap when there is Therapy? to be listened to”.
Morning all!!!
:):):)
Mark.
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 10:45
#50
Divers (Simon) wrote:
Misanthropologist wrote:
‘Why don’t we just blast them with our laser cannons?’
‘an excellent suggestion sir, with just two drawbacks. One, we don’t have any laser cannons, and two, we don’t have any laser cannons. Now I realise that technically this is just the one problem, but I thought it was such a big one, that it was worth mentioning twice.’
I could go on all night. Which is a good reason to stop there! :D
‘An excellent suggestion sir, but from now on might I suggest this conversation be carried out by people with brains larger than a grape?’
(And that’s not a ‘D’Oh’ moment, surely? :))
Night night.
Thats the reason I stopped I could have gone on all night.
Go on then one more!
“What about Krissy?”
“she dead dave everbodys dead dave”
“oh ay, she was part of my plan, she was going to come and live with me on my farm”
“Well if it’s any consolation if she was alive the age difference alone would be a problem, the only help to you now would be if it was frosty and you needed something to grit the drive with”
Right I really have to stop now!:D
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 11:25
#51
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
:D
*opens mouth to suggest another one*
*decides against it*
Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast.
(dammit! ;))
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 11:48
#52
Divers (Simon) wrote:
There are too many good lines to choose from.
“your nickname was never ace…Mayabe Acehole?”
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 18:00
#53
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
Probably my favourite Holly line is in one of the distress calls.
‘Personally the only thing that keeps me sane is the friendship I share with my collection of singing potatoes.’
;)
‘That’s it, switch to Red Alert.’
‘Are you quite sure, sir? It does mean changing the bulb…’
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 21:17
#54
not_that_kind_of_guy (a story on the radio) wrote:
from “queeg” the best line by a mile is (i am doing this from memory here)
rimmer: but he’s supposed to have an I.Q of 6000
queeg: it has a 6 in it, but it’s not six thousand
lister: so what is it?
queeg: six
cracks me up every time :)
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 22:38
#55
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
:D
Far too many good lines.
(and probably not enough Doh moments for this thread. :o)
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 22:45
#56
Philth wrote:
This thread has become a D’oh! moment.
Posted on Sat, 23 July 2005 at 22:56
#57
motherh666 wrote:
Posted on Fri, 5 August 2005 at 15:31
#58
not_that_kind_of_guy (a story on the radio) wrote:
after 15 days of being clean and sober i went out with some people from work on tuesday. this turned out to be a terribly bad idea as i fell off the wagon in quite spectacular style. i spent a rediculous amount of money, felt like shit all the next day and spent the majority of that evening chatting up a very handsome 19 year old boy who is now terrifed of me. whoops… :)
Posted on Thu, 1 September 2005 at 20:53
#59
deadsetgav wrote:
rock n roll - Its always funny totally fucking up on beer :)
Posted on Thu, 1 September 2005 at 21:03
