Wall of Mouths

I hear ya, man!

My chronic shyness, resulting in total lack of communication skills with the opposite sex, is a major pet-hate of mine.

Sometimes I wish I was a bastard. At least bastards score.

Title: Re: Pet hates

Citizen Erased wrote:

Blonde Blade where are you? You’ve gone all quiet girl!

It was her birthday on Saturday so I’m betting she’s still hung over :D

Pet hates: People who leave washing up in the sink so you can’t fill the kettle (or for that matter run a sink of water to wash up with), presumptious people, BT, townies, BT, the abusive little 12 year old trollop who lives down my street and needs a good slapping, BT, Coldplay, that awful dream where BT put me on hold and make me listen to Coldplay. Or Travis. Like anyone can tell the difference anyway, miserable gits. Arriva trains (“we don’t have a driver, there’s some leaves, we’re on strike, what’s a train service?”) and did I mention BT?

Oh…and gorgeous lovely men, who I would steal if they weren’t a million miles away, thinking that they need to change who they are to impress women when that’s simply not true. I really hate that. ;)

Teen goths.

Dear sweet jesus…”tool are so fuckin’ class…they realy started this whole gothic thing you know…you can;t be really gothic and hate tool! They have so many classic layers.”

Look here missy, several points:

1. Fuck up.
2. Goths wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for the Sex Pistols, Joy Division, the Cure and the Smiths. In fact goths and all the modern metal stuff wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for garage punk. Have you ever listened to the Replacements?
3. Tool play big fucking dumb metal. They aren’t “tortured geniuses” They are some guys who play loud music under the influence of drink and drugs. You want tortured genius? Try Ian Curtis, try Thom Yorke, try Kurt Cobain. Try fucking Peter WARLOCK!
4. Fuck up.
5. Have you ever had fucking depression and spent time in a hospital? No you haven’t. Get a fucking life and be thankful you DON’T have mental illness. You stupid twat.
6. Its not cool to cut yourself. It’s…FUCKING…STUPID…you twat!
7. You don’t look cool and evil and shit in that leather and those chains. You look like a right fucking numpty who spends their life locked in a small dark room.
8. Wash your fucking hair. It’s not cool to leave it greasy and smelly. It’s fucking unhygenic.
9. Fuck up.

And did I forget no. 10?

10. FUCK UP. YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT POPULAR MUSIC IN THE LAST 20 YEARS.

Hey! You used the word numpty! That is most good. It has cheered me up no end.

Wasn’t being a goth invented by a bunch of germanic types that lived near the Huns and Vandals and so on, Hmm, don’t see many teens going around with big broadswords and so on- very 4 real I don’t think!

The ‘women only like bastards’ thing is a bugger, but then, if I was a lass the ‘I’m too frightened to talk to you but if you got to know me you’d think I was great’ thing would get on my tits, but no-one else would.

And people that smoke whilst stood over their kids. Really pisses me off

Hairy Joe wrote:

Teen goths.

Dear sweet jesus…”tool are so fuckin’ class…they realy started this whole gothic thing you know…you can;t be really gothic and hate tool! They have so many classic layers.”

Look here missy, several points:

1. Fuck up.
2. Goths wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for the Sex Pistols, Joy Division, the Cure and the Smiths. In fact goths and all the modern metal stuff wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for garage punk. Have you ever listened to the Replacements?
3. Tool play big fucking dumb metal. They aren’t “tortured geniuses” They are some guys who play loud music under the influence of drink and drugs. You want tortured genius? Try Ian Curtis, try Thom Yorke, try Kurt Cobain. Try fucking Peter WARLOCK!
4. Fuck up.
5. Have you ever had fucking depression and spent time in a hospital? No you haven’t. Get a fucking life and be thankful you DON’T have mental illness. You stupid twat.
6. Its not cool to cut yourself. It’s…FUCKING…STUPID…you twat!
7. You don’t look cool and evil and shit in that leather and those chains. You look like a right fucking numpty who spends their life locked in a small dark room.
8. Wash your fucking hair. It’s not cool to leave it greasy and smelly. It’s fucking unhygenic.
9. Fuck up.

And did I forget no. 10?

10. FUCK UP. YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT POPULAR MUSIC IN THE LAST 20 YEARS.

The word “numpty” rules.

MY Hates,

Not being able to get a decent pint of Guinness for under £2 anywhere in the UK.

Queing to get into bars really fucks me off. Fair enough queing for a club but the bar bit is a joke.

Prick teasing girls who flirt and flirt and then when I make a move look at me like I have leprosy.

People who make me feel like a twat cos of my taste in music.

Mother fucking, cock sucking people who cut me up when I’m driving.

Self righteous Americans (sorry to generalise but most are !!)

Having to associate with gangsters and filthy drug dealers to buy weed when it shouldn’t be illegal anyway. (comes out of God’s fair land, it can’t be bad !!!)

Bayern Munich

Great subject! Here’s my list (in no particular order):

- Ajax Amsterdam
- Frans Bauer & Grad Damen (the Dutch folks will understand me…), Kane, Di-rect, Las Ketchup
- People who drive slower than the legally allowed speed
- Useless violence
- My shyness concerning the opposite sex (sounds familiar, right?)
- Lazy wankers, too lazy to work
- Mercedes Benz, pimp-style BMW’s
- Soap operas
- Ben Affleck

I could go on and on, you know!

- my colleague who bought a fur coat!
- people accuse me of being a member of the ALF (i’m not!!!)
- people telling me what to do
- old people who don’t give you the change to step out of the tram
- the same old people complain about the youth!
- Snapcase and Strife changed their style
- that there’s a great concert, but you can’t get there (I don’t have a drivers license)
- fascist scum and violence

Doesn’t post-humourous means after death??

Well, aren’t you the prettiest zombie alive after all? Glad to hear that you are still alive and kicking though.

New pet hate - that women (okay, 2 girls in the whole year) only seem attracted to you when you’ve got a girlfriend EVEN WHEN YOU SAY I HAVE GOT A GIRLFRIEND AND HAVE NO INTENTION OF CHEATING ON HER. They just think ‘oh what a loyal and lovely guy, I’ll have a bit of him’.

Admittedly, this doesn’t happen very often, but it didn’t happen at all when I was single.

And then… when you tell your girlfriend that a stunning lass tried to pull you and got nowhere*, you’re in even more trouble. How does that work?

And even more… when you write it all down, you do look a bit of a dick. Oops…

Procrastinating. Hate that I do that. Better go and do some work I suppose.

*Actually one young lady did get the runner’s up prize of a snog with my mate but didn’t seem that interested in him, and the other’s now agreed to a blind date with the same mate.

Okay, in that case you’re probably in a position to say how to make the opening comment (ladies, feel free to join in here).

We know not to use cheesy chat-up lines
We know that we should just ‘be ourselves’
But

We also know that if we just come up to a lady and say ‘Hi I’m Terry’ or whatever, we will get rebuffed. Especially if there’s a gang of women.

We just don’t know what to do instead.

My real name isn’t Terry.

Title: My “New & Improved” Pet Hates

Things I Hate About Everybody Else…

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time… I
know
where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my
crotch when
I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire
room
for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the
channel manually.

3. When people say “Oh you just want to have your cake and eat
it too”.
Fucking right! What good is a cake if you can’t eat it?

4. When people say “it’s always the last place you look”.
Of course it is.
Why the fuck would you keep looking after you’ve found it? Do people
do
this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film “did you see
that?”. No tosser, I
paid €7 to come to the cinema and stare at the fucking floor.

6. People who ask “Can I ask you a question?”. Didn’t
really give me a
choice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is ‘new and improved!’. Which is it? If it’s new,
then
there has never been anything before it. If it’s an improvement, then
there
must have been something before it.

8. When people say “life is short”. What the fuck?? Life is
the longest damn
thing anyone ever fucking does!! What can you do that’s longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks “Has the
bus come
yet?”. If the bus came would I be standing here, Knobhead?

and how about, can i use you pen?

I hate that you’re all so sad and unhappy and I don’t know what to say to make it better except hey it’s Friday, which is of little comfort to those you that work on Saturday, or can’t get a job anyway.:(

And yeah, rich people who complain about having no money - if your house is worth a million then sell it and move into a shoe box like mine. Then you’ll have plenty of cash!

I read about it somewhere. It’s the pheromones that have us all gone cracked, I tells ya!