#39,631
Gimme Back My Brainsaw (Mike Hunt) wrote:
happy biddy about 6 months early
Posted on Wed, 13 February 2008 at 01:10
#39,632
mrs h wrote:
Posted on Wed, 13 February 2008 at 07:23
#39,633
deadsetgav wrote:
Posted on Wed, 13 February 2008 at 08:38
#39,634
The Wrong Type of Ladder... (Mr Kog) wrote:
“We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning…” - OK, admittedly I did start the fire in Billy Joel’s beard, but once again it’s one rule for Billy and another for the common man…
Posted on Wed, 13 February 2008 at 19:33
#39,635
Taunty Dan wrote:
Well there WAS only one rule for billy, STOP SINGING. But since HE couldn’t abide by the rules then why should we, hmmmm?? *lights up cigarette in a bloody pub, of all places!*
Posted on Wed, 13 February 2008 at 19:57
#39,636
mrs h wrote:
We’ve got our next trip to Amsterdam booked :D Just imagine - sitting in the pub relaxing with a fag and a… hang on…they don’t serve pints over there, do they?
Fuck.
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 08:52
#39,637
Dennis wrote:
I don’t really think people travel to Amsterdam to sample the local lagers…
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 09:41
#39,638
Misanthropologist (d) wrote:
mrs h wrote:
We’ve got our next trip to Amsterdam booked :D .
We have?! Great! Quick, everybody: get packed!! *goes in search of his sheepskin suitcase*
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 12:01 in reply to an earlier post
#39,639
Taz94 (Tessa) wrote:
Hello people,
mrs H, enjoy your fag in the pub in Amsterdam while you can, because i don’t think you’ll be able to do that for much longer here either.
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 12:29 in reply to an earlier post
Last edited by Teethgrinder on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 12:37 (Corrected use of quotes)
#39,640
Taz94 (Tessa) wrote:
But maybe they’ll introduce pints as a way to make it up to you??
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 12:30
#39,641
The Wrong Type of Ladder... (Mr Kog) wrote:
Hamster dam???… that’s where I’ve been going wrong…I’ve been using regular Beavers…
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 14:32
#39,642
Gimme Back My Brainsaw (Mike Hunt) wrote:
The other night I was at a pub for lock in and as sad as this sounds i was actually amazed we were able to smoke inside the pub, first time ive ever smoked in a pub. It was a bit of a dive bar and it was great.
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 15:21
#39,643
Dennis wrote:
It used to be that they locked pubs so you could carry on drinking, but now you can legally do that anyway they lock the doors so smokers can have a fag!
Plus ca change…
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 15:31
#39,644
Gimme Back My Brainsaw (Mike Hunt) wrote:
yeah, wahts the deal with that? the pub i was in is licensed till 11 but they leave it open till like 3 but lock the door, but if you want to leave they let you out the frojnt door which is where the towns cctv is usually pointing, i asked the barmaid, and she said there allowed to open as late as they want just not let anyone else in past 11 which is a bit farfetched to me.
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 15:38
#39,645
Dennis wrote:
I think when the new licensing laws came in it wasn’t as simple as “bingo, now you can open 24 hours or as long as you want” I think you had to apply for an extention to a certain time, and I think many pubs didn’t bother (cos of course it costs money to do it) but most police just can’t be arsed to even check now as many pubs DO have the extension. And quite frankly no-one gives a shit either way now, not even the police. I think everyone accepts that pubs should be able to open later and it’s not pubs that are causing antisocial behaviour, it is teenager naffing off over the park with a bottle of vodka that the dude in the local offy sold them cos he doesn’t really give a toss about morals so long as his till is bulging and at least it stops the kids from holding his shop up at knifepoint.
Erm, sorry to rant.
So, anyway, Kiss - Shite, eh?
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 15:45
#39,646
Gimme Back My Brainsaw (Mike Hunt) wrote:
hahahaha, when i used to drink on the streets we payed homeless people to buy our booze, or got my bird to get it cus she had tits and apparently having tits makes you more likely to get served.
yeah shite but not as bad as incubus.
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 15:48
#39,647
Dennis wrote:
I have a pretty decent rack of Man Boobs and I don’t have any trouble getting served - Booze, fags for my wife, whatever - so there may be some truth in that.
Mind, the fact that I am 34 and look like I had a very long paper round as a child may also be a contributing factor…
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 16:01
#39,648
Gimme Back My Brainsaw (Mike Hunt) wrote:
Cant be as bad as them though?
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 16:02
#39,649
Dennis wrote:
Jaysis! When your boobs reach your belt, you know it is time to think about cutting down on the pizzas and upping the old exercise routine.
So…until I get to that point…*Stacks up the pizzas and seels exercise bik*… FUCK IT! :D
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 16:13
#39,650
Dennis wrote:
^ Typo correction: SELLS exercise bike…
Damn these fat fingers and these tiny keyboard buttons…!
Posted on Thu, 14 February 2008 at 16:14
#39,651
mrs h wrote:
Taz94 wrote:
Hello people,
mrs H, enjoy your fag in the pub in Amsterdam while you can, because i don’t think you’ll be able to do that for much longer here either.
:eek: Really? We’re going in April, and it’s our last smoking jaunt, we were planning to stop as soon as we got home. You don’t think they’ll ban it before April do you? I’d go in coffee shops instead at a push, but most of them won’t let you drink! What’s that about???? :rolleyes:
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:01 in reply to an earlier post
#39,652
mrs h wrote:
Dennis wrote:
Damn these fat fingers and these tiny keyboard buttons…!
Are they your fingers? I thought you were selling balloons.
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:02 in reply to an earlier post
Last edited by hoochalobster on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:08 (Corrected use of quotes)
#39,653
mrs h wrote:
Help!!! Rene, did I break GM? Everything else is ok but GM is covered in big grey boxes!!
Could someone fix my quote at the same time please? Ta :)
Morning Gav :)
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:05 in reply to an earlier post
#39,654
hoochalobster (Sarah) Super Moderator wrote:
I corrected your quotes and then the grey box of doom vanished.. is it okay for you as well now?
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:08
#39,655
Taz94 (Tessa) wrote:
mrs h wrote:
:eek: Really? We’re going in April, and it’s our last smoking jaunt, we were planning to stop as soon as we got home. You don’t think they’ll ban it before April do you? I’d go in coffee shops instead at a push, but most of them won’t let you drink! What’s that about???? :rolleyes:
You’ll be fine then, they will ban smoking in pubs and restaurants from July 1 2008. So no problem in April and you can have a good holiday :D
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 09:28 in reply to an earlier post
#39,656
King Caffeinebomb I wrote:
Dennis wrote:
I think when the new licensing laws came in it wasn’t as simple as “bingo, now you can open 24 hours or as long as you want” I think you had to apply for an extention to a certain time, and I think many pubs didn’t bother (cos of course it costs money to do it) but most police just can’t be arsed to even check now as many pubs DO have the extension. And quite frankly no-one gives a shit either way now, not even the police.
Whatever your opening hours were before the new law - you were entitled to keep. If you wanted to open any later you had to apply for an amendment which cost money. There is no longer a legal drinking up time - it used to be 20 minutes. When the new licenses were dished out, they did ask you to specify your own drinking up time, but as the Ennis rightly points out, nobody gives a flying fuck these days anyway, provided you’re not serving kids still in their nappies.
It’s ALWAYS been easier for girls to get served because from the ages of about 14 to 30 it’s nigh on impossible to tell how old they are unless they’re wearing My Chemical Toilet T Shirts, or grey hair. Besides if you smile sweetly at the youngest barman and flirt gently he’ll give you absolutely anything. Teenage boys get it much harder as they are infinitely more likely to kick off about who’s been shagging “our Kayleigh” than teenage girls are, so barkeeps will make more effort to weed out the young lads than young girls.
Besides, having lots of inebriated teenage girls on the premises is good for business, because leery old pervs quite like to peer at them over the top of their mild or smooth or whatever while they talk to their equally leery, old and pervy mates about how much money they donated to William Hill that day.
This is why pub managers incessantly employ smiling, large-breasted, teenage blonde girls to work behind the bar.
Or maybe that was just me - Dennis?
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 10:15 in reply to an earlier post
#39,657
deadsetgav wrote:
Spot on.
I used to love working behind the bar on weekend evenings ;)
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 10:50
#39,658
King Caffeinebomb I wrote:
I used to love watching other people working while I bravely did “crowd control” from the safe confines of my office, only venturing out when I saw a particular fittie. That might be how I met Mrs H you know…
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 10:53
#39,659
Dennis wrote:
caffeinebomb wrote:
This is why pub managers incessantly employ smiling, large-breasted, teenage blonde girls to work behind the bar.
Or maybe that was just me - Dennis?
Oh yes, this is absolutely true, no point me trying to deny it. Although the “smiling” bit is particularly difficult - Caffeinebomb will back me up on how hard it is to get a member of the Wetherspoons staff to actually break into a facial expression that doesn’t give the impression that you have just exhumed their great grandmother and danced around nude with her remains.
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 10:58 in reply to an earlier post
#39,660
Dennis wrote:
^ Just to clarify: I NEVER exhumed any female relatives (or indeed male ones either) of any of the staff I worked with. Nor did I dance with human remains.
The nudity, as I have explained to the company on many occasions, was a one-off result of stress combined with the confusion brought on by a change in my medication.
And seeing as it is mine anyway, I see no reason why I shouldn’t wash it as vigourously as I damn well choose. Although perhaps not when I am stood on the back bar. During a mystery customer visit.
Let’s just put this one down to experience eh and move on.
Jesus, anyone’d think you all manage to get through the whole of the day without ripping all your clothes off and acting out scenes of gross indecency. :rolleyes:
Posted on Fri, 15 February 2008 at 11:28
