Wall of Mouths

Title: Let the jokes commence, but…

I sell drugs for a living.

Unfortunately, that ain’t a joke, I’ve been a qualifed pharmacist since 1998. It was a standing joke that for each matriculation photo I posed for from 1993-1997 I wore the same Shortsharpshock T-shirt [the one with the razor blade on the back, fact fans]. I don’t have it now, I think my mum chucked it out.

Still, the holes under the oxters were nearly as big as the neck-hole, so it probably wasn’t a big loss.

Title: Seven degrees of Tom Jones?

Wasn’t there an interview in Kerrang! in 1994/5 when Therapy? were playing at some MTV awards show, and Tom Jones introduced them with the immortally funny joke “Ladies and gentlemen, I think we need some therapy… AND HERE THEY ARE!!! etc.”

Still trying to think of those random bootlegs my mind has given me. No luck. They pop into my head several times a week, but after I’ve had a few drinks and I’m ranting on the internet, can I remember any of them?

Title: Internal Jukebox

Maybe it’s just me, in which case feel free to throw whatever abuse you think is necessary in my direction.

You know when you hear a song and your brain provides you with one of those “bootleg mash-ups” the kids keep talking about these days? Like one of those Strokes/Christina Aguilera hybrids, except it only exists in your head.

I’ve had plenty over the years. (Naturally, I can’t think of any of them just now to give you an example.) What I’m trying to put across, though, is that you hear one thing and your unconscious mind makes an instant connection to something totally unrelated.

I just listened to Nurse. As the dying strains of “Hypermania” faded away, my bastard brain made it segue into “Black” by Pearl Jam.

I actually don’t mind Pearl Jam, but this made me feel slightly unclean for some reason.

Title: Leaping in too late as usual

My DVD arrived from play.com the other day (£13.99!), sadly a few days late for a birthday present. Certainly, it rocks, but as has already been mentioned the sound seems a bit “clean”. Obviously it’s been mixed in stereo, DD5.1, and DTS.

I never thought I’d say this, but the DD5.1 track seems to be better than the DTS one. :eek:

Honestly, I’m not a geek. ;)

Title: Troublegum

The smell of Troublegum quite disturbed me at the time. Quite an aroma of benzenes, by far the most aromatic of the CDs I have ever bought. None other, before or since, has come close to that particular smell.

Although have had a whiff of Blue’s latest opus, and that fucking stinks.

Title: Re: Re: Is it me ?

mrk wrote:

I’ve said it in another thread, but I think it sounds an awful lot like Cracker.

Now I understand. When I read your other post, I couldn’t stop thinking of Robbie Coltrane. :D

Aaaaaaaah…

I’ve never had MTV or anything, so I’ve hardly ever seen any promos beyond what was on the Chart Show or Raw Power (whatever happened to Krusher and his strangely effeminate dog, anyway?)

Yes, DVD… live stuff, videos, interviews hopefully, and 5.1 sound would be nice.

Title: The Perfect Band

Vocals: Johnny Cash
Guitar: John Frusciante
Bass: Bill Gould
Keyboards/Backing Vocals: Trent Reznor
Drums: Fyfe Ewing
Rhythm Guitar: Les McQueen (ex-Creme Brulee)
Painful Suicide: Lee from Blue

1: Nurse
2: Troublegum
3: Infernal Love
3 and a half: Hats Off To The Insane
4: Shameless
5: Semi-Detached
6: Pleasure Death
7: Babyteeth
7 and a half: Born In A Crash
8: Suicide Pact - You First

I really thought Shameless was a massive return to form, after the single I’m looking forward to High Anxiety…

Title: P’Noodle

My faith in Pot Noodles was severly tested by the “turkey & stuffing” flavour special edition. Exactly the same taste, consistency, and (if you leave it for exactly 23 minutes) temperature as fresh vomit.

Chicken & Mushroom, plus added chilli powder, cumin seeds and oregano, that’s the way to go.

Title: Does Exactly What It Says On The Tin!

er… hello.

Been a fan since 1993, but I seem to have lost my Shortsharpshock T-shirt. Has anyone seen it? It’s got big holes in the armpits. Or at least it did the last time I saw it. Perhaps some kind soul has repaired it. If so, I’d like it back. Please.

Title: Top 75

According to nme.com, If It Kills Me/Rust is… no. 76.

Bastards.

One place below Def Leppard. I demand a recount.