Wall of Mouths

How do you get a granny to shout “Cunt!”?
Get another to shout “Bingo!”

Title: support acts

ok im gonna see the lads in leeds in a few hours, any one know who the support acts are?

A senior citizen in Florida bought a brand new Corvette convertible. He took off down the road, flooring it to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head. “This is great,” he thought as he roared up I-75. He pushed the pedal to the metal even more. Then he looked in his rear view mirror and saw a highway patrol trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. “I can get away from him with no problem” thought the man and he tromped it some more and flew down the road at over 100 mph. Then 110, 120 mph.

Then he thought, “What am I doing? I’m too old for this kind of thing.” He pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the trooper to catch up with him. The trooper pulled in behind the Corvette and walked up to the man. “Sir,” he said, looking at his watch. “My shift ends in 10 minutes and today is Friday. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I’ve never heard before, I’ll let you go.” The man looked at the trooper and said, “Years ago my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper, and I thought you were bringing her back”

“Have a good day, Sir,” said the Trooper

ive got 3 tarantulas, and back at my parents home we have an old black cat called max.

deadsetgav wrote:

I have both PSP and DS… I do have to say as fun as the touch screen on the DS is, for me, the PSP has the edge (GTA Liberty City!)

it does look alright but since their porting it to ps2 soon it kind of makes the psp version redundant.

Title: PSP or DS?

Who has what?

I have the DS with little interest in the PSP, i find the games are more interesting and more abundant in quality titles. Examples:
Metroid Prime Hunters
Mario Kart
Trauma Centre
Sonic Rush
Another Code
Project Rub

One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving under the influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his.

Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.

The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, “Tonight, I’m the Designated Decoy.”

Title: Shameless, Why all the hate? (merged)

ive noticed alot of people bashing this album and i just dont understand? its fantastic, i’d even say its one of their best albums(loads better than the followup high anxiety) please explain why no one likes this album!

A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a horrible
sunburn. He goes to the hospital, and is promptly admitted after being
diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to
blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribes continuous
intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra
pill every four hours.

The nurse, who is rather astounded, says, “What good will Viagra do for
him, Doctor?

The doctor replied, “It’ll keep the sheets off his legs.”

posters turned up this morning(very good too) not sure what happend to the flyers, anyone else get them?, but im gonna terrorize Derby with these once ive finished all my uni work :(!

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back
and forth.

A cop on the beat sees him and approaches “Can I help you sir?”

“Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr” the man replies.

The cop asks “Where was your car the last time you saw it?”

“It wasss on the end of thisshh key” the man replies.

About that time the cop looks down and sees the man’s ‘privates’ hanging out of his fly for all the world to see.

He asks the man “Sir, are you aware that you are exposing yourself?”

Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without missing a beat, blurts out “I’ll be damned ——- My girlfriend’s gone, too!”

i voted NANE because its had a year+ to rock my socks off, but OCFA is fecking ace, in time im sure it will top NANE. but as for high anxiety i find it weak and in my opinion the worst tpy? album

matthew wrote:

Nothing funny about the fake muscles of WWF either! :)

I think you’ll find its ‘WWE’ and like monowar its justified by being so over the top its ace!

Judge Dredd wrote:

That link above is dead now and if you do a search on the site all you find is the modern love album!

hehehe, we broke the website :-)

Title: Rain Hits Concrete - Opinions?

just downloaded it and i think it was worth every penny!

crazy cocaine eyes is the highlight.

whats do the rest of the WoMbles think?

gimmebackmybrainsaw wrote:

Iron maiden suck

Blasphemy!

are you insane? blood sugar sex magik pisses all over californication. the new chili peppers stuff is weak. bring back the funk!

An extremely ugly woman walks into a store with her two kids. The man at the counter asks, “Are they twins?” The woman says, “No, he’s nine and she’s seven.” Then she says, “Why? Do you think they look alike?” “No,” he replies. “I just can’t believe you got laid twice!”

the 2003 show was ace, i wasnt there but watched the webcast about 20 times:) cant wait for tonight.

scuzz play therapy all the time, they had both rock you monkeys and rise up on the play lists, and most of the troublegum vids also.

not quite sure what to make of that.

they show it in the uk, its really good. havent watched it in a while, im never home when its on :(

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, “Where did you get such a great bike?”

The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want.’”

The second engineer nodded approvingly, “Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”

Title: Rain Hits Concrete EP (merged)

its cool how there is a new ep but i would rather have an actual cd than just some mp3 tracks!! why couldnt this get relesed as a cd also??!!

Lemo wrote:

peter kay is about as funny as getting cancer. he tells jokes that your dad told you when you were little. its comedy for old ladies and idiots

well said!

not heard them yet, doesnt he just play drums with them?

Divers wrote:

Chuck Norris, David Hasslehoff and Mr. T walk into a bar… I pity the fools in that bar.

classic.

An 80-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor asks him how he’s feeling. The 80-year-old says, “I’ve never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?”

The doctor considers his question for a minute and then begins. “I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid trophy hunter and never misses a season. One day, when he was going out hunting, he was in a bit of a hurry and accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun. When he got to the creek, he saw a prime beaver sitting beside the stream of water. He raised his cane and went ‘bang, bang’. Suddenly, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead. What do you think of that?”

The 80-year-old said, “I’d say somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver.”

The doctor replied, “My point exactly.”

Title: J Mascis BBC In Session

as a huge dinosaur jr fan i decided to try some of the j mascis solo albums,i loved both (more light + free so free) i then found this jem, mascis playing his new solo stuff live then throwing in the odd dino classic and even a pavement track!!!! this is a great cd and any fan should check it out!